Just when I thought most things with my tween and teenager were going well the sibling conflict and fighting escalates! I am exaggerating but it does seem to happen all the time!
I’ve researched a little and wanted to share with you the approach which I am going to try to use to try and sort it out.
I know it’s a normal part of growing up for my sons to fight. They fight over all kinds of things. There’s the ‘Get out of my room’ fight. The ‘Stop looking at me’ me. The ‘Did you take my…’ fight. And so, it goes.
As a parent, it can be stressful at times for me but I know it is part of growing up and I also know that it is also positive because if I handle it correctly they will be able to solve problems, deal with different opinions and learn how to compromise and negotiate.
It’s so funny how some days go. They can be fighting all day then the next they are being supportive and protective of each other!
I am trying my best to leave the boys to it and let them try and resolve the issue by themselves. While this may take a bit longer than if I stepped in – and less stressful – it’s not really teaching them anything. If they can come up with solutions themselves all the better.
It’s also an issue for me not knowing who started it. So, I guess if I focus on what the conflict is about perhaps I have a chance to help them solve it.
Another problem is that I don’t want either of them to think I am taking sides. One of them will probably feel they have been unfairly treated or worse, think I’m showing favouritism. So, my go to strategy will to see if I can motivate them to resolve the issues themselves.
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