I suffer from mummy guilt. Heck I suffer from all kinds of guilt to be honest. There are days when all I seem to do is work extremely hard to gain perfection, even if it runs me in to the ground. I often chase my tail with this quest for perfection. I berate myself for not doing enough. I wonder why I can’t be the perfect parent, have a spotless house, redecorate the house. And so the list goes.
Not surprisingly, research has shown that beating myself up doesn’t work. It has also shown that perfection doesn’t work either. These might seem obvious but when I’m in the middle of feeling these things, I often dismiss everything else.
In my attempt to move away for this guilt I am trying to work on it. I am trying to acknowledge the guilt when it raises its ugly head and then let it go. I have started to work on this and it is tough. Making a conscious decision to even acknowledge the guilt is so difficult but I know so much will improve if I continue to do this.
I honestly don’t know why I try and be a super-parent. Do you? I guess acknowledging that I’m not ok, acknowledging the guilt and releasing surely will have a positive impact on my parenting.
Giving myself permission to make mistakes is something I’m not used to but it’s something that I know must be continued. I need to let go of trying to be perfect.
I need to get back to appreciating time spent with my family and stop worrying about the little things (like untidy bedrooms!). After all, my family means so much to me, being with them is a pleasure. Things go much more smoothly when I’m in a happier mood. My kids also feel the benefits.
I know dealing with guilt will be an ongoing exercise but I’m sure over time it will become easier.
Do you suffer from mummy guilt? I’d love to hear your thoughts.